Ep. 77 How to Heal Together Without Losing Yourself: Co-Regulation with Tamara Thompson
Have you ever realised you've been looking to your partner to make you feel okay?
In this episode I'm joined by Tamara Thompson, a New York-based licensed marriage and family therapist, certified clinical hypnotherapist, and relationship expert for one of the most honest conversations about modern relationships I've had on this podcast.
We go into co-regulation: what it actually is, what it looks like when it's healthy, and where it crosses the line into emotional dependency.
We talk about the pattern of outsourcing your nervous system to your partner, what it costs the person doing it and the person being looked to as the fixer, and what it actually means to take responsibility for your own emotional experience inside a relationship without shutting down or shutting your partner out.
In this episode:
What co-regulation actually is and what healthy co-regulation looks like between two people
Where it crosses the line from connection into emotional dependency
Can two dysregulated people regulate each other or does one person always carry more?
Why so many people enter relationships expecting to be completed, healed or rescued, and where that belief comes from
The signs that someone is outsourcing their emotional regulation to their partner, and what it costs the partner on the receiving end
What emotional responsibility actually looks like in practice without becoming emotionally closed off
What happens to a relationship when one person starts doing deep inner work and the other doesn't
Whether you're in a relationship, navigating one ending, or simply wanting to understand your own patterns more clearly, this conversation will give you something real to take away.
Connect with Tamara: https://www.tamarathompsonlmft.com/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/therapy_tam
Music: Dawn by Sappheiros @sappheirosmusic